A tribute to Coach Dave Sochor on his retirement - Journeys 7-12-15

Journeys for Doniphan Herald

7-12-15

Last night there was a reception to celebrate the retirement of Dave and Susie Sochor at the interstate Quality Inn.  My years at Doniphan High School were a long time ago; sophomore through senior years, 1974-77. I took one class from Mr. Sochor, “Automotive repair.”  Mr. Sochor was also one of my football and track coaches.  I was around the weight room in high school, but not one of Mr. Sochor’s powerlifters. 

I don’t remember specific things he said.  I do remember what it felt like to be around him.  Coach Sochor somehow found a way to be positive, encouraging and challenging at the same time.  And he was subtle; just a word, a look or a pat on the back.  He had a way of being able to plant the seed of risking myself in such a way that I’d think it was my idea in the first place.  

I’ve also told Dave that I’ve always considered him a modern day Peter Pan.  He saved a lot of lost boys in high school by giving us a challenge; in shop class, on the football field, track and weight room.  Especially, small skinny Doniphan guys who could build muscle powerlifting and win big trophies by lifting a greater percentage of their weight. 

Most teachers do not retire as millionaires.  What I want you, Dave, to understand is that your investment of your time and soul into all us teenagers has made the world a better place.  We are better people because of you.  And in the currency of God, that’s worth more than a million bucks.

Thank you Coach Sochor!

Grace & Peace,

Rev. Kelly

Journeys 6-21-15

Journeys
6-21-15

We lived in Charleston, SC from 1988 to 1993.  Our two older children were born there at the hospital just down the street from the Emmanuel AME church on Calhoun Street.  Cindy served as an associate pastor at Trinity UMC, just three blocks from the Emmanuel church.  It is the first African Methodist Episcopal church in this country. It was a break-off from the Methodist church of its day.

The history in this colonial port city was hard for this Nebraskan to comprehend.  Cindy’s Trinity UMC celebrated it’s 200 year anniversary while we were there and it was young as churches go for that city.  The Civil War began there with the battle of Fort Sumpter.

So my grief is spattered with images of that place.  When they said there were nine victims of this hate crime, I wondered if we knew any of them (we did not).

My heart breaks at the thought of nine lives snuffed out.  My heart breaks at the thought of this crime being racially motivated; complete strangers killed by a white man because they were black.  The anguish grows deeper as the story emerged that the shooter sat in on the Wednesday night bible study for an hour before he stood and started to shoot.  Then we find out that the killer was just 21 years old.  Just a kid to this old man.  Somehow that makes this hole thing just that much more insane.

In my heartache all I know to do at this point is to pray.  Pray that those involved may know God’s presence in the midst of their darkest hour.  I invite you to join me as I pray for the victims and their families.  Pray for the killer’s family.  Pray for the Emmanuel AME church family.  Pray for the city of Charleston.  Pray for the ancient culture that would produce a child that would think its OK to shoot innocent people because their skin color was different than his.

Grace & Peace,

Rev. Kelly

Journeys 2-8-15 "Valentine's Day"

Journeys

2-8-15

Saturday is Valentine’s Day.  It is the florist’s shop’s Super Bowl and Christmas all wrapped into one day.  They are praying for no snow this coming Saturday, ‘cause Valentine’s Day can make or break your year when you’re in the business of flowers.

This year in my family Valentine’s Day is all about getting those care packages off to our kids in North Carolina and Florida.  The Bishop’s Confirmation Day in Lincoln falls on Valentine’s Day this year, so I will be road-tripping our confirmands to Nebraska Wesleyan on the day of love.  We should get back around 7 p.m., but Saturday nights are usually work nights for the pastors in my house (if you know what I mean).

For us, after a little over thirty years of marriage, Valentine’s Day has become gentle reminder.  Small public notes on Facebook to, “Thank God for the love of my life!” are combined with private cards and kisses that say, “Thanks for being you, and for sticking with me all these years, or,  . . . I love you more every day.”  Some time around Valentine’s day we’ll go to a movie or out to a favorite place to eat.  But Valentine’s Day for this old married couple is just a day to look up from the hustle and bustle of our lives and catch our life-mate’s eye and say, “You know I love you.”  Then they wink back and say, “I know you do, I love you too.”

Grace & Peace,

Journeys 8-10-14 "Off to college"

Journeys

8-10-14

We’ve done this before; abandoning a child at an institute of learning and walking away.  With both Katie and Zack, I remember thinking that college dorms had not changed much since I was there (a long, long time ago).  You cram a couple kids into a small room with painted cement block walls.  The entire floor shares a common bathroom.  They eat at a school cafeteria a couple blocks away from their dorm.  This week, its Emily’s turn.

She is so excited/terrified about this next phase of her life.  She’s ready to explore the world outside her home nest.  She’s been ready for a long time. 

I keep having flashbacks to when we dropped her off at a daycare for the first time; took her to kindergarten round-up.  Will she make friends?  Will she like her teachers?  Will she be challenged and thrive and grow.

I remember the feel of her little hand in mine, walking from our house to the school.  At the cross walk we talk about looking both ways for cars when all she sees is the playground  swarming with kids.  She’d practically jumping out of her skin with excitement.  I’m thinking about the possibility of scrapped knees and wondering if I have any band-aids on me.

This week I don’t want to let go of that little hand, but I’ve got to.  The school has already anticipated that moment and scheduled appropriately.  It’s in the brochure, “Time for parents to leave.”  She will be so excited about her new roommate, the dorm floor pizza party, the freshman bonding party/orientation.  She’ll be ready for us to go.  

She’ll have to have to pry us loose from that hug, point to the car and say, “Look both ways now before you cross the street . . . go on now,  you’ll be fine.”

Grace & Peace,

Journeys 2-23-14 The return of the cranes.

It’s something you count on. I look forward to it.  

I find myself squinting toward the sky to see if those are geese, ducks or cranes.  It appears that the geese get to come first, then the ducks, then the cranes.  And even though migrating thousands of miles should count for something, we don’t get half as excited about the geese and ducks as we do the cranes.

Is there enough water in the platte river for the cranes?  Is there too much water?  Did we leave enough corn on the ground to attract them?  

The arrival of the sandhill cranes is a sign that spring is actually going to happen.  They also put us on the map.  Where we live is special because of who they are.  They make our home a tourist destination each spring.  Famous people make an annual pilgrimage to south central Nebraska to see one of the last great migrations on earth.

The cranes are bigger than ducks and geese. Their long legs and huge wing span set them apart in flight.  But the way you can really tell if that “V” flying over is our cranes is the sound.  There is nothing like that sound.  We long for it in February, then can’t get it out of our heads in April.

Their call touches something deep in our souls.  It resonates with some primeval clock that’s set to the turning of the planet. We get to witness something big; something that’s been happening since before our ancestors ancestors even thought about migrating to the high plains to live.  We get to be part of this ancient drive in their tiny bird brains that tells them to stick together and be on the move north for the summer once again.

So just when the events of our world seem to have gone all out of kilter with new shootings every week, congressional budget battles, murders, the threat of another flu epidemic, record snow storms in the east, drought and the threat of wild-fires in the west, we squint toward that black “V” in the sky and hear that sound and we know that they’re back. Something is right with our world.  It’s going to be O.K.

Grace & Peace,

Journeys 2-16-14 "Valentine's Day"

Valentine’s Day.

When you fall in love you lose yourself. No, that’s not quite it. Love smacks you upside the head. Yeah, that’s closer.

There is something about loving another that’s outside your control; like you can’t help yourself.  At the same time, you’ve made a choice to give yourself to it.

I will admit that I have been in love several times in my life.  Sometimes I knew it.  Sometimes I had no idea.  

The father side of me, trying to explain this thing to my pre-teen kids has said that it’s like all of a sudden, that other person’s happiness becomes as important or more important than your own.  Seeing them smile brings a joy that’s bigger than the stars!  And the best is when it is mutual; when they love you and you love them.  That’s not to say that their love is equal to yours.  Cause’ love cannot be measured.  It is as individual and unique as a snow flake. 

My three kids have been in multiple relationships.  And each time they’d fall for another, I’d start fearing “the break-up.”  But a part of me wants them to fall hard and deeply in love; no half-way in the things of the heart.  The other part of me wants to protect them from getting scars and callouses on their souls.  

One side of love is like being knocked over by a huge wave.  The other is a clear conscious decision; the will to give yourself away, to serve, no matter what their response.  Their reception of your love does not matter as much as your desire to give it. 

I have told couples at their weddings that from now on, every day you will wake up and choose to be married.  And that wedding ceremony is the beginning of you publicly telling the world that you choose to love this other person like you love no other person in this world.   And I say that, knowing full well that I could not talk them out of it if I wanted to.  Cause' love has smacked them upside the head and they re out of their minds, head over heals, gaga over each other.  And it’s just fun to be in the same room with the power and depth of that love.

Grace & Peace,

Rev. Kelly

Pastor's Page November 2013 Newsletter

Pastor’s Page

November 2013

This has been one of the prettiest falls in recent memory.  We’ve had several still crisp days with nothing but clear blue skies. There have been actual leaf colors for an extended period of time.  The reds are redder and the yellows yellower.  I’ve even witnessed several  trees whose leaves just fell straight down like a leaf shadow on the ground.

Having grown up in Nebraska, I don’t expect much from fall.  Lots of years, it lasted around three days.  You could go from 90 degrees to a snow storm in 12 hours time.  And a lot of those snow storms knocked all the leaves down in one fail swoop.  Other years, the rain and wind took fall and blew it to South Dakota before we really got a chance to get a good look at it.

This year we’ve been given a long slow soak of fall.  We’ve eased into a gradual transition toward winter.  It almost makes you think that if fall is this good, then maybe winter can’t be that bad!  Almost!

But we high plains weather survivors never forget bad weather.  It sticks with us.  When some transplanted southerner comes in from an October blizzard and says, “Have you ever seen it like this in October?”  We say, “Oh, yea, I’ve seen worse!”

So it’s this good weather that un-nerves us.  We’re afraid that if we smile with deep sighs; soaking in the deep angle of the sun too much, we’ll be punished for that later.  

But this year I invite you to join me and go against those weather survivor instincts.  Sneak in some true appreciation and gratitude for these days framed by geese in the sky and a carpet of deep colored leaves on the ground.  Take an extra second to burn the memory of that flaming red tree into your brain.  After all, you and I both know that it could be years before we ever get to see that sight again.

Grace & Peace,

Rev. Kelly